Cindy's Open House Blog: "Turmoil!"

Wednesday 11 November 2015

"Turmoil!"

"Turmoil!"

Hi dear friends and followers. I would like to share a topic with you that was inspired by a friend's entry earlier today. Thank you for visiting and reading my blog

Turmoil in your mind? Goodness, have you ever felt the turmoil of the entire world swirling around in your own head threatening to consume you whole like some giant beast swallowing up a bunch of tiny insects? It’s the eater of planets, like a gigantic planet-eating dark energy spider ready to swallow our planet whole.

Fortunately there is still enough good in the world to prevent this dark energy from swallowing the entire planet into it's dark belly of greed, power, corruption, dismay, discomfiture and deception. Do you know who they are? I call them the “tin gods.” They are the ones who are there to discourage you at every turn, to tell you what you can do and what you can't do, or if you do this or that, you will certainly go to hell, or you will be an outcast, like some kind of filthy plague-ridden beast. Some also call them the “committee of they.”

“They” could be members of your own family, friends, employers, bankers, business directors or associates, consultants, as well as any number of governmental agencies and institutions that are supposed to be at our service, to serve the people."Crap!" on that fat lie. They seek only to line their pockets with our money. The entire system has been set up to deceive us, leading us to believe that the only hope we have is through them, to fight their wars, kill people in the name of whatever, just to line their pockets.

You may ask what does this have to do with your life being in such turmoil to the point of inability to make decisions, “ staying on the fence” or stepping off in any direction is better than remaining on the fence? Maybe what I have said so far means nothing to you, maybe it's just me releasing my own anxieties and fears.

I know that I had to live with those fears, not just live *with,* but having actually *lived those fears.* I was always in a state of agitation as to whether I would ever be allowed to live to see my dreams come true. I almost didn't make it, I came so very close to giving up. I guess once I stopped playing beat around the bush and finally awakened to see just how volatile a place this world had become, it was a harsh but sobering awakening. I knew what I had to do it before it was to late.

I knew that I had to be at peace with myself for what was left of my life and be my own healer, also to love myself so that I may come to know how to love another. I fight for who I am and to defend who I am and proudly stand at the side of any other women to defend their rights, "at any cost!"

The pain is still there, it still hurts. I can't hide from the pain because it's all around me and in me. Who inflicts this pain? Those who think they are better than the next person. They are those who are called the elite, and we are but peasants to them. This is what I feel around me, pain and misery created by the hierarchies.

All I can do to offset this fear and pain or to fortify myself against it is to face it head on day by day, "every day." Being in the midst of it, doing what ever part I can to contribute to bringing relief for those who suffer when ever I can. It is not an easy task, for more times than not, those that you wish to help will reject the hand you offer them. But I have a need to persevere, to continue to fight the darkness with only my own inner light for my weapon.

As I said, you may not understand. A lot of people don't. When I mention these kinds of feelings and thoughts to others, they do certainly look at me rather askance. On this part of my journey I walk alone, for no one will want to walk with me. That is true of most peoples’ lives. There is a part of them that they have to walk through alone for no one else can or will have any desire to even try to. Do you understand? If I keep this up I will have a book before you come on-line to read it.

Cindy